“The purpose of life is a life of purpose.”  ~Robert Byrne

How does someone create a life of purpose? 

As a child and teen I spent many lonely hours and days locked in closets or basement storage rooms by the hands of my mother who suffers from mental illness.  I spent countless hours dreaming of a good life- a happy life.  Through trials and hardships one learns to have determination, courage and most importantly the hope for something better.  Everyone has a story of hardships and trials.  It is not what one went through that is so significant; it is what one learned from their trials and how they made their life better. 

I determined when I left home that I would live a life worth loving.  I determined to surround myself with loving people, positive things and to enjoy each minute.  More importantly, I realized that to be loved, I had to give love.  Service is love and I want to spend my life serving and loving others.  In that, I have found love- I have found a happy life.

What many people do not realize is that we determine our lives.  No matter the situation, you can always find happiness and joy.  It is a decision.  Instead of mourning over the past, I have chosen to be happy and make each day beautiful, happy, special, new and productive. 

Projects

Having a list of projects to complete keeps my excitement for new things fresh.  I look forward to the time I can work on those projects and feel the sense of accomplishment it brings when I complete them.  Projects can be anything from organizing the garage to building a tool rack, finishing a scrapbooking album, or decorating a cake.

While I had one parent with a mental illness who did not take care of her body and mind through professional help, I did have another parent- a wonderful father.  He taught me through his example that work is not drudgery- it is rewarding and extremely satisfying.  After the work is done, leisure activities are fulfilling to the soul.  My dad did welding as a hobby.  After working a full day and dinner was cleaned up, he usually headed to the garage to work on his projects.  From the time I was old enough to answer the phone I remember taking phone calls from many people who wanted to buy the trailers he built as a hobby.  He also taught himself how to do leatherwork. He makes wallets, belts, and purses from leather.  He always has a project he looks forward to working on.

Occasions

Everyone likes to feel included.  If there aren’t any events, parties or special occasions on my calendar to attend and look forward to, I find them.  Think of the things you like to do.  For me, that list would include: working out, scrapbooking or paper crafts, talking with like-minded women, dating my husband, or sight-seeing with my family.   Once you know what you’d like to try or be involved in, turn to the internet or local papers to find classes or support groups in your local area that you can attend.  Being a part of something is fulfilling and gives life a little more zing and excitement.

Love Caring for You

Studies have shown that mothers who are depressed are very likely to have children with lifelong depression issues.  This is due to the fact that children are directly affected by their parents.  The parents are also an example on how to live life.  It is important to take care of our bodies and minds and then demonstrate to our children how to create a life with things to look forward to.  Children will learn that it is a personal responsibility to create our own happiness amidst our trials.

It is fulfilling to go to the hair salon every few months to get your hair done.  Going to a spa or creating one at home, going to Yoga or another exercise class are all ways you can care for your body and that create positive feelings of self worth that you emanate to those around you.

Goal Setting

I will be skipping over the negative sayings about goals because I don’t believe they are true unless you make them true.  I have learned that goals make life more exciting and enriching.  Through the years I have set goals for everything from stopping a bad habit, to the number of books I want to read in a set timeframe, to moving into the kind of home I want to live in.  Most of the goals that were important enough to me I accomplished.  There were those I set and didn’t reach, but I tried and learned from the experience of striving for that goal.  Some goals, after making them, I discovered I actually didn’t care that much about achieving them for whatever reason so I let them go.  That is the beauty of life- learning through our experiences.

We cannot expect others or outside circumstances to create the life we want to live or even to give us the emotional fulfillment in living a life we wish to have.    It is up to us.  If a person is unhappy with their life, they can change it.  Starting with changing one’s thought patterns from negative and focusing on what is wrong with their life to that of positive things that they do want.  Always strive to think positively about your life and all the blessings you do have.  You can create that happy, fulfilling life starting today.

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